CHARACTERS

•      Saint George
•      The Dragon
•      Father Christmas
•      The Doctor
•      King of Egypt
•      Turkish Knight
•      The Giant Turpin     

Enter the Turkish Knight.

Open your doors, and let me in,
I hope your favours I shall win;
Whether I rise or whether I fall,
I'll do my best to please you all.
St. George is here, and swears he will come in,
And, if he does, I know he'll pierce my skin.
If you will not believe what I do say,
Let Father Christmas come in--clear the way. [Retires.

Enter Father Christmas.

Here come I, old Father Christmas,
    Welcome, or welcome not,
I hope old Father Christmas
    Will never be forgot.

I am not come here to laugh or to jeer,
But for a pocketfull of money, and a skinfull of beer,
If you will not believe what I do say,
Come in, the King of Egypt!--clear the way!

Enter the King of Egypt.

Here I, the King of Egypt, boldly do appear,
St. George, St. George, walk in, my only son and heir.
Walk in, my son St. George, and boldly act thy part,
That all the people here may see thy wond'rous art.

Enter Saint George.

Here come I, St. George, from Britain did I spring,
I'll fight the Dragon bold, my wonders to begin.
I'll clip his wings, he shall not fly;
I'll cut him down, or else I die.

Enter the Dragon.

Who's he that seeks the Dragon's blood,
And calls so angry, and so loud?
That English dog, will he before me stand?
I'll cut him down with my courageous hand.
With my long teeth, and scurvy jaw,
Of such I'd break up half a score,
And stay my stomach, till I'd more.

[St. George and the Dragon fight, the latter is killed.

Father Christmas. Is there a doctor to be found
  All ready, near at hand,
To cure a deep and deadly wound,
  And make the champion stand.

Enter Doctor.

Oh! yes, there is a doctor to be found
    All ready, near at hand,
To cure a deep and deadly wound,
    And make the champion stand.

Father Christmas. What can you cure?

Doctor. All sorts of diseases,
Whatever you pleases,
The phthisic, the palsy, and the gout;
If the devil's in, I'll blow him out.

Father Christmas. What is your fee?

Doctor. Fifteen pound, it is my fee,
    The money to lay down.
But, as 'tis such a rogue as thee,
    I cure for ten pound.

I carry a little bottle of alicumpane;
    Here Jack, take a little of my flip flop,
    Pour it down thy tip top;
Rise up and fight again.

[The Doctor performs his cure, the fight is renewed, and the Dragon again killed.

Saint George. Here am I, St. George,
    That worthy champion bold,
And with my sword and spear
    I won three crowns of gold.
I fought the fiery dragon,
    And brought him to the slaughter;
By that I won fair Sabra,
    The King of Egypt's daughter.
Where is the man, that now will me defy?
I'll cut his giblets full of holes, and make his buttons fly.

The Turkish Knight advances.

Here come I, the Turkish Knight,
Come from the Turkish land to fight.
I'll fight St. George, who is my foe,
I'll make him yield before I go;
He brags to such a high degree,
He thinks there's none can do the like of he.

Saint George. Where is the Turk, that will before me stand?
I'll cut him down with my courageous hand.

[They fight, the Knight is overcome, and falls on one knee.

Turkish Knight. Oh! pardon me, St. George, pardon of thee I crave,
Oh! pardon me this night, and I will be thy slave.

Saint George. No pardon shalt thou have, while I have foot to stand,
So rise thee up again, and fight out sword in hand.

[They fight again, and the Knight is killed. Father Christmas calls for the Doctor, with whom the same dialogue occurs as before, and the cure
is performed.

Enter the Giant Turpin.

Here come I, the Giant, bold Turpin is my name,
And all the nations round do tremble at my fame.
Where'er I go, they tremble at my sight,
No lord or champion long with me would fight.

Saint George. Here's one that dares to look thee in the face,
And soon will send thee to another place.

They fight, and the Giant is killed; medical aid is called in as before, and the cure performed by the Doctor, to whom then is given a basin of girdy grout and a kick, and driven out.

Father Christmas. Now, ladies and gentlemen, your sport is most ended,
So prepare for the hat, which is highly commended.
The hat it would speak, if it had but a tongue;
Come throw in your money, and think it no wrong.